is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
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