I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
