I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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