trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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