thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
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