dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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