i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
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Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
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I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
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