HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Randomize
