Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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