hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Princesses don't give blow jobs
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm experimenting with sincerity
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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