last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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