Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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