I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
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I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
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