WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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