5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
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