she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize