Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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