He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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