There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Randomize
