Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
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I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
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Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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