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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom

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• (727): View more from Florida

  if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.

  (1-727): View more from Florida

  Lol welcome to greek life

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• (813): View more from Florida

  Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  I ordered a moonbounce.

  (813): View more from Florida

  Fuck, you win.

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.

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• (906): View more from Michigan

  Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.

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• (707): View more from California

  The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.

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• (518): View more from New York

  I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me

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• (281): View more from Texas

  If its not for food we ain't going out.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!

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• (631): View more from New York

  You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch

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