White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Randomize
