i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
