mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize