I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
