so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
