bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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