i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
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