I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
