Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
