Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I need moral support for this bender
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
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