so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.