A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
After tacos, we're chasing women.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs