Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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