sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
did i just pee glitter
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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