Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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