Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
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