If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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