wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
