so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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