He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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