Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
