I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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