So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
