I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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