Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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