Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
