I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
