this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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