Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
