I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
This is my gift to your gina
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
