apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
