Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
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Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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