I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize